my dance style ranges from white dad at a barbecue to stripper whose rent is due tomorrow

spermbanker:

date me to disappoint your parents

rodneykong:

shoutout to me for still not having my driver’s license

okaymad:

soon i will have to pay rent and food and INTERNET AND IM NOT READY FOR THAT

rumour:

HAVE YOU EVER LIKED SOMEONE SO MUCH THAT YOU DONT EVEN WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH THEM YOU JUST WANT TO LIKE BE WITH THEM AND BE ACKNOWLEDGED BY THEM AND KISS THEM AND HOLD HANDS WITH THEM LIKE YOU DONT EVEN THINK OF THEM SEXUALLY

  • Doctor: I think you'll need a shot
  • Me: AYYYYY
  • Doctor: AYYYYY *brings out tequila*

fighting-the-storm:

Panic! at the Disco: First & Last Words
(Inspired by x)

Natalie Dormer in Captain America (2011)

compulsives:

have you ever had a friend who is literally like your soul mate but like in a friendship way like you are so compatible and perfect for each other like idk

“I swear I’m okay. I’m just tired. And no, not just the kind of tired where I’ve had a long day, but the kind of tired where I slept for 7 hours last night, and yet, I feel as though I haven’t had a good night’s rest in months. The kind of tired where taking a deep breath feels like carrying twice my body weight. The kind of tired where I feel as though I’ve been searching for you as if you were the last piece of buried treasure on this earth. The kind of tired that I fear no amount of sleep can ever cure.”

ConnotativewordsWeak and Weary (via exoticwild)

sassykardashian:

when did midnight become the prime time to start all homework

Title: Cop Car
Artist: Keith Urban
Played: 18 times

scarsofyears:

There was something by the way the blue lights were shinin’, bringin’ out the freedom in your eyes, I was too busy watching you going wild child to be worried about going to jail. You were thinkin’ that runnin’ for it would make a good story, I was thinkin’ you were crazy as hell, but you were so innocent, but you were stealing my heart, I fell in love in the back of a cop car.


thetowndrugdealer:

Bloody Mary isn’t scarier than seeing my own reflection in the mirror, sorry